Hello, Stranger
I find that some days it is much easier for me to extend a kind word toward some guy I don’t know behind me in line at 7-Eleven than it is to the guy that I married.
Due to social upbringing it is customary for me to be courteous and polite to others. I also like people in general, so friendliness is just my nature. I could be experiencing a most unpleasant day and still nod politely and exchange pleasantries to a stranger that I encounter in public. On the other hand, let Durwood walk in the door at home and I’m prone to snap his head off.
It helps to determine the source of my irritation. A troublesome morning at work, an afternoon with a screaming nephew who is cutting teeth, or a teenager who just remembered to inform me that his college application fee was due last week are certainly not the fault of Mr. Bean. He is simply blameworthy once he entered our home and became a target. Had it been his own behavior that generated my bitchiness, then that would be an entirely different subject.
It is in the private realm of my relationship with my spouse and other loved ones that I allow terse remarks and contentious behavior to exist. Even if I’m just plain tired, I wouldn’t talk to the guy who helps me carry my grocery bags out to the car like I’ve talked to my husband on these occasional bad days. Why do I think it’s okay to talk to Durwood in this tone? Surely it’s because I haven’t listened to the grocery guy’s snoring for the last 24 years, laundered his underwear, heard his fishing stories and bore his three children.
Fortunately, Mr. Bean is a good husband. He can recognize the wrath of a woman scorned by his own hand, and is adept in determining otherwise. Though this is understood, I’d like to stop using his proficiency as an excuse for my occasional malicious streak. I don’t care for the domino effect it creates in our household.
An’ ye harm none, do as thee will. Perhaps the next time that Mr. Bean comes home after I’ve had a rough day, I’ll treat him as I would any stranger. Maybe even a tall, dark, and handsome one at that.
