The End Of An Era
As a testament to the power of faith in Divine Order, Caroline made her arrival to the planet exactly three years ago. My sister Evie and her husband had spent years trying to conceive a child. After draining a substantial amount of their savings to endure the emotional and physical demands of all available medical options, success with fertility remained elusive. Evie had become resigned, and was content to relinquish her battle to have kids.
“What would I have done with a kid, anyway?” Evie pondered during one of our front porch visits.
“I love my job,” she continued. “I can’t imagine not teaching anymore. And I don’t think that I could have ever been comfortable placing my baby in daycare.”
“Well,” I heard the words float out of my mouth. “I suppose that I could have watched your baby.”
Evie looked about as surprised as I had felt when I said it.
About five months later, without the assistance of medical technology, Evie was pregnant. (Surprise!)
“Were you serious when you offered to babysit?” Evie really just wanted to know.
(Was I?)
This is why I love Evie. Only a sister of this caliber can skip the awkward formalities that some people deem necessary to engage in. Out of four sisters, Evie is the one who is most comfortable with herself. Honesty between us has always been pure and judgment-free.
Upon further review, I recognized that my flip comment had actual roots. Caring for Evie’s baby while she went back to work was what I was supposed to do. With several months to prepare, and a highly seasoned stay-at-home mom career under my belt, I welcomed the opportunity to spend time with Caroline. Having had three kids of my own, it did not seem to matter that my “baby” was thirteen years old when Caroline was born. Instincts and experience provided me with a relaxed and confident approach toward caring for my precious niece.
Second-time-around ‘parenting’ is a curious experience. There is a popular theory that once you get through the initial year or two of infant care, you develop a form of amnesia toward the grueling schedule. Lack of sleep, time-consuming attention, and loss-of-personal-freedom defines the agenda. Once you experience a few nights of uninterrupted sleep, even if it is only five consecutive hours in a row, you begin to entertain pleasant thoughts of “having another one of these things called babies.” I had done it myself. Twice.
Agreeing to take care of Caroline held a peculiar sense of purpose. There was no ‘amnesia’ in play when I made the conscious and fully informed decision to take care of my niece. My sister is a gifted teacher whose contribution to education is invaluable. My own kids have reaped the countless benefits of their Aunt Evie’s intuitive guidance. Besides, there was not a snowball’s chance in hell that I was going to let my goddaughter go to daycare.
Of course, committing five days a week to watch Caroline was only an eight or nine hour gig. Evie picked her up at five o’clock every day, and I got to sleep every night. Huge difference.
For the first time in my life, I had the chance to experience the complete freedom from the “on call” and “on guard” mindset that every full-time mother of a young child maintains. Natalie was 14 years old, so I did not have to worry whether or not she was going to shove a jelly bean up her nose when I wasn’t paying attention. I love Caroline, but after nine hours of ‘constant-alert’ status, her departure every day after five o’clock was pure bliss.
Two full school years alone with Caroline has been a delightfully unique experience. Her daily presence provided me with a timely reminder of our Divine origin, and I had the pleasure of recognizing the fresh sense of purpose that sparkles brightly within her eyes. The eyes of a young child will always provide the evidence that we arrive with our All-Knowing Self completely intact. Each and every day that I looked into sweet Caroline’s eyes, my heart grew wider with the knowledge that we are all undeniably connected to Divine Source. I was always just too damn tired to appreciate it when my own children were small.
Last year’s arrival of Caroline’s brother Anson (Surprise, again!) had prompted us to reevaluate the child care options. Evie is not only a gifted teacher, but an intuitive sister. Although both of us were reluctant to abandon our original arrangement, the addition of Anson would appear to have altered the mental stability of one Jillian Olive Bean. After another seven months of trial and error with alternate babysitters, Evie has found the ideal arrangements for Caroline and Anson. Aunt “O” has been saved.
I love you, Evie.
I know this pales in comparison to what the babies put you through, but I’ll be happy to have the tv again in the mornings. Dora and Mickey are fun, but this “end of an era” will mean the History Channel and trumpet practice get to come back.
We all have enjoyed the multitude of hours spent with the little ones. But I think having them back every once a week for a game night will suffice:) And now that they have been sent off from Auntie O’s daily care, I’m positive they will use every ounce of information and reassurance of who they are in their daily lives.(After all, when is it too early to know about that?)
Good job, Auntie O!
How right you are Natalie…your mom is a pro at that! And Caroline is THE most self assured kid I have ever met and while your mom helped do a lot of that, you certainly worked your magic on her as well. Oh…and Jim, I understand your celebration…I recall at trip to Alabama when I couldn’t wait until you fell asleep so I could stop listening to Shrek. It took me a while to be able to enjoy Mike Meyers after that ….although it was the trip where you received your first Aunt Evie wedgie, so I guess there’s that! So…yeah….